This Is What Comes Out of My Pen at 3 AM
by whysosiriusblack45
Summary: This is a crack fic... I apologize. M for language and kinks and gay sex and MUCH swearing.


I apologize in advance for the shit you are about to read. Basically, sleepovers + s'mores + Diet Coke = CRACK FIC. I have recently delved into an obsession of the Supernatural kind. Also Doctor Who. And Sherlock.

Once again… I am so, so sorry.

Once upon a time there were two boys named Sam and Dean. They were pretty. Dean liked to wear women's panties... true fact. Sammy grew his hair out like a girl.

they were manly men.

also, Sam's sideburns are currently eating his face.  
I'm, personally waiting for the moment when they meet under his nose and create a moostache.

Then the boys met an angel. His name was Cas.

Cas likes porn.

Dean and Cas like to roleplay as the babysitter and the pizza man.

Cas learns a lot of things from the pizza man.

They have the sex.

And then Molly shows up with Amanda. Evie is studying martial arts with Tenzin and Korra, and can't attend the gay porn festival being held at the Winchester's house.

Amanda and Molly can, and they enjoy it.

There are many kinks at this gay porn festival: knife, thigh holster, shoulder holster, salt rounds, handprints, profound bondage- bonds, amulets, impala sex, ceiling sex, cock of death, leather jacket, real boobs, perky nipples, freckles, assbutts, asshats, holy fire, jerks + bitches, roleplay, demons and shit, bondage, angel porn, werewolves, holy water, confetti, hookers, chastity, pizza man, hamburgers, asian porn, back porn, face porn, eyesex, THE SEX, Latin kinks, wing kinks, trenchcoat kinks, etc

Bobby and Crowley want to join in. Amanda ships Crobby so hard. She likes it when older men get it on. (this is all Molly's speculation) SHE LOVES THE OLDMANSEX. ["NO I DON'T," SAID AMANDA!]

Molly likes to snort.

Evie and Amanda use their survival/girl scout skills to tie Sam and Dean to their beds, shirtless... and pantless.

But they don't dare touch Sam's cock for fear of imminent death.

However, his back is fair game.

Cas arrives to save the boys, but Molly traps him in a ring of holy fire. She demands he takes off everything, but the trenchcoat.

She then forces him to manifest his wings.

Both Evie and Molly appreciate this greatly. Me wingsta.

Amanda was too busy caressing Dean and Sam's backs.

It's always the quiet ones who end up groping the hot guys' asses.

Molly is a Destiel shipper, so she makes Dean and Cas do the kiss. hehehehe... NOW IT'S CANON BITCHES.

Molly is going to hell.

To screw Crowley.

heheheh...

me pervertedsta

So Evie strokes Cas' wings, and pretends to have a fake orgasm- oh wait, it's real.

FUCK YOU, EVIE. I HAVE PERFECT GRAMMAR.

shuddup i'm ocd... FUCKERS.

So then Amanda and Molly travel to the future, and kidnap future!Dean and stoner!Cas

They bring them back to the past- and then things become a whole new level of kinky

Then Balthazar gatecrashes and fucks everyone... because he's a slut.

Then Gabriel joins the party, and makes Dean die over and over again. It's hysterical.  
To everyone but Sam.

Sammy gets pissed, but then Amanda strokes his back, and he's like a kitty cat and purrs. Then everything is happy and horny once more.

Amanda runs to Universal Studios and back, grabbing the Moose juice, and feeding it to Sammy. Sammy gusta le juicesta.

Gabriel turns the mass orgy into a dance party, and soon everyone is jammin' and dancin' like fools- even Raphael.

Then Chuck writes a smut fanfic, and it accidently becomes real. The stars of the smut fic are Sam and Gabriel. lol.

Sam finally forgave Gabriel for killing Dean so many times. Gabriel's excuse was that it was the heat of the moment. The heat that Sam and Gabriel shared was hot and steamy. There was much sex. It was of the gay variety.

It involves candy, because Gabe has a sweet tooth. All I'm gonna say is- Chocolate syrup.

and whip cream.

And then Jess burns on the ceiling, but no one gives a fuck. Sam and Gabe continue to fuck even as she burns on the ceiling, because no one cares about season one characters.

Then the Doctor shows up with Sherlock and Jawn.

Jawn eats all the jam in the fridge. Sherlock deduces that Dean and Cas want to have the sex.

There is much eyesex going around from everyone.

Then Captain Jack Harkness shows up, fucks everyone, and then leaves.  
Jack is a slut.

He and Balthazar get married, and then continue fucking everyone else.

Jack hits on Dean, and Cas gets over protective and tries to kill Jack, but Jack can't die... so yeah.

Then John turns into a hedgehog, and Sherlock turns into a cat, and then they chase each other in circles.

Then Sherlock jumps off the roof- BUT HE LANDS ON ALL FOURS BECAUSE HE'S A CAT.

AND THAT'S HOW THE FANDOM SOLVED THE REICHENBACH FALL.

SHERLOCK SURVIVED BECAUSE HE WAS A KITTY CAT.

Then Lucifer shows up and kills everyone.

THE END.


End file.
